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Sunday, November 4, 2012

Two year and 18 days


I thought about writing today but I felt like I needed to bravely suffer through it. I ended up being so distracted with life that the suffering didn't seem much like suffering at all. Then tonight came. I planned to go to church and find some comfort and encouragement through the preacher's translations of God's scripted lessons. I made good on those plans but when I got there God laughed and said
, "You thought this is where you'd find me tonight?" I replied, "That's what I thought, it was so a year ago, but I see I was wrong", so I left. 
My eyes haven't rained all day but then a good friend told me he missed his chance to say goodbye to someone he knew that passed away today. And I was reminded of........... then my cheeks became the path of a waterfall. I realize instead of trying to be strong, submitting to my weaknesses is courageous in itself. I miss my daughter and I was afraid to revisit the pain that comes along with that. I'm not afraid anymore. 

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